Last year, we left our church. Not the Church, mind you. But still, it was our church. And while we felt the Lord leading us to do so (despite our strong convictions against ‘church-hopping’), it was still really hard to leave. And hard to begin somewhere else.
One of the first times we visited our new church, I ventured over to the women’s ministry director at the kiosk. After chatting with her for a few moments, I said, “If we end up coming here, I’d be interested in hearing more about your ladies ministry; it’s one of the ways I’m involved at our chu–”
At this point, my face sprung a leak—and not just a dainty little trickle down my cheek. Oh, no. This was a full blown geyser,with deep, shaking sobs and choking snorts. It was the kind of crying you have no control over. The kind you don’t really want to share with a stranger. It was unbelievable, really.
The woman (Marie) handed me a tissue, as I battled for composure. She was so sweet and reassuring. I told her, “I’m so sorry… it’s only our second time here with the kids and they’re really struggling.”
Just them, huh?
Marie said, “Oh, of course…” and kindly waited for me to settle myself and mop up the mascara puddles on my face. Then she asked, “What church do you attend now?” I opened my mouth to speak… and repeated the whole routine. Another geyser. More shaking sobs and choking snorts. It was absolutely surreal.
I had been trying to twist a cap onto my emotions (being new and all), but my heart was spewing the truth. Namely: Change ishard. It’s very, very hard. Especially in the fall, when everything is kicking off, and you have to force yourself to sign up, to walk in, to introduce yourself… to be new.
But you know what? God is in the business of making us all new. And sometimes that involves placing ourselves somewhere new—even when we felt more comfortable and safe and secure in the old.
It’s been one year since my geyserly conversation with Marie, and I’ve truly settled into my new church. I still feel new, but I have new friends and new ways to serve. Marie even asked me to be a new small group leader for Bible study this year. Last night, at our leader’s meeting, she said, “God is going to do something new this fall—I just know that he is and I’m so excited!” With deep conviction, my heart agreed with her. God is doing something new. And it’s good.