Hey, I’m Shannon.

And I’ve been a Comparison Girl for as long as I can remember. Literally, my first memory at age four, is of feeling humiliated because someone found out that I could not read. Oh, the humiliation!

It seems silly now. Why was I so worried about being exposed as an illiterate preschooler? Yet some of my current struggles are just as absurd. Why do I worry about being exposed as a less-than-perfect mom? Or a middle-aged woman who struggles with her weight? Or a Christian who still sins?

Constantly trying prove that I measure up or trying to hide when I don’t, does not lead to a life of freedom and joy. Here’s what does: learning to live me-free. I hope you’ll stick around and join me in learning these lessons from Jesus on me-free living in a measure-up world! 

Want to learn more about me? Come visit my “about me” page! 

Do you compare yourself?

 

On social media, in the neighborhood, at church, or the school drop-off lane, do you drive yourself to prove that you measure up? Do you feel ashamed when you don’t? Measuring yourself against others isn’t healthy. And it isn’t God’s plan. In fact, the way of Jesus is completely upside down from this measure-up world. He invites us to follow him and be restored to freedom, confidence, and joy.

Join me, as I share what I’ve discovered about my own measure-up fears and get-ahead pride. In this six-week study, we’ll explore the conversations Jesus had and the stories he shared with people who—like us—were comparing themselves.

Let’s leave measure-up comparison behind and connect with those around us by choosing Jesus’s me-free way of living: lifting others up and pouring ourselves out!

Shannon Popkin helps us take a fresh and challenging look at the everyday mindsets we wrestle with. Showing us God’s higher ways straight from the life of Jesus, she calls us from our me-focused thinking to His kingdom-focused purposes. After this study and with the power of the Holy Spirit, I won’t allow those thoughts to stay around any longer. 

Lynn Cowell

Proverbs 31 Speaker, Author of Make Your Move

If you struggle with measuring up. If you’re worried about what people think. If you dread someone seeing you in a less than ideal situation, then you’re human. We all struggle with comparing ourselves to others in some way. That means we all need Shannon’s honest and wise words on the pages of this book. I know I did and I’m betting you do, too!

Jill Savage

Author of No More Perfect Moms, No More Perfect Kids, and No More Perfect Marriages

Shannon Popkin has done it again! She has masterfully written another must read to speak to the struggles of our soul. Inviting us to look up and listen to the tender truths of God and learning to silence the lies of the enemy against us, Shannon shows us how to finally live freely in a cultural of continual comparison. For every woman who has an area of her life where she wonders if she is truly enough- here is your answer.

Erica Wiggenhorn

Author of Unexplainable Jesus: Rediscovering the God You Thought You Knew by Moody Publishers

Leader’s Kit

March 30, 2021. Sign up for leader updates.

Kit includes:

  • 6 Teaching Sessions, which correlate with the chapters of the book
  • Both DVD + digital downloads
  • One Comparison Girl book
  • One Journaling Workbook
  • Leader Discussion Guide

Each session is about 18 – 25 minutes long. Dive deeper into what Jesus teaches about the difference between comparison in the world and comparison in the Kingdom.

Journaling Workbook

The companion Comparison Girl Workbook offers:

  • A place to record your responses to the Bible study and application questions at the end of each lesson.
  • Thought-provoking stories and journal prompts, which correlate to each chapter’s theme.
  • Space for taking video session notes, plus the printed verses and additional observation study and discussion questions.
  • Extra prayers, quotes, and verses to encourage you on your journey.
  • Available either as part of the Leader’s Kit, or as a separate purchase.

Get the Comparison Girl Freebies:

FamilyLife Today

with Bob Lapine and Dave & Ann Wilson

Do you remember the first time you felt like you didn’t measure up? I do. It was sixth grade camp, and I told the story here on the FamilyLife broadcast.

It’s not always comfortable to tell the world how I’ve struggled (and still do!) with feeling inadequate. My hope, in sharing about my own Comparison Girl journey, is to invite others to Jesus’s me-free living in a measure-up world.

Here’s the two-part broadcast:

Grounded

with Erin Davis & Dannah Gresh

Revive Our Hearts’s daily response to Covid-19 crisis is to remind us to be grounded in the truth of God’s Word. I’m delighted to join Dannah Gresh and Erin Davis to talk about the role of comparison in our current crisis, and how to respond like Jesus.

Moms in Prayer

with Lee Nienhuis

Are you feeling anxious and overwhelmed, as you get “back-to-school” updates from your school, church, and local governments? Join Lee Nienhuis and I as we talk about our illusion of control, the destruction that comes with comparison, and how to respond today with the uncertainties of tomorrow.

No More Perfect Podcast

with Jill Savage

Jill has been talking about this topic of comparison and perfectionism and how they divide us way longer than I have. She had some great things to add to our conversation as we discussed comparing in two directions–one where we come out better than someone else and one where we come out worse than someone else. When we compare “up,” we experience jealousy. When we compare “down,” we experience disgust. 

Listen in and be reminded that when Jesus interacted with people comparing themselves, he never said, “Just stop comparing!” Instead He turns it upside down and invites us to the freedom and joy of me-free living.

 

Coming Alive with Jenn Hand

with Jenn Hand

Laugh with Jenn and I as we tell about our first impressions of each other (yes, we were both comparing), and compare our patterns of collecting coffee mugs – which are completely opposite. Plus we’ll talk plenty about Jesus and his unique way of comparing. 

 

Compared to Who?

with Heather Creekmore

It’s really an author’s dread. You’re scrolling Amazon, and see a book on YOUR book’s same topic. But what about if your book’s topic is comparison?!
It will take some humility, but it COULD mean that you’re meant to be friends.
I so appreciate my new friend and fellow “Comparison Girl” Heather Creekmore. She’s the real deal, y’all. I love her heart for the LORD and her willingness to invite the “other author” onto her show that’s all about comparison: @comparedtowho
I hope you’ll love our conversation, and become a regular listener of “Compared to Who?”
GEMS Girls Clubs

with Cindy Bultema

It was a joy to connect with my friend Cindy Bultema at GEMS (Girls Everywhere Meeting the Savior), and talk about Comparison at Christmas.
 
You know, I so relate with the disciples who were always trying to elbow past each other, asking, “Who’s the greatest? How do I measure up?” But Jesus taught them to ask a better question.
 
The Love Offering

with Rachael Adams

I so enjoyed my conversation with Rachael, and I hope you will, too! Here are some quotes from our conversation:

  • “This desire to be in control and compare the things I can’t control overlapped more than I realized.” 
  • “My heart seems to be bent toward pride and perfection and measuring up in the eyes of other people and it doesn’t lead to freedom and joy.” 
  • “We’ve got to handle the problem with comparison before we even go over to the window.”
  • “He’s inviting us to adopt a me-free mindset. I’m not here to prove I’m better than you. I’m here to serve you.”
  • “When you’re feeling inadequate you want to retreat and pull away. The enemy attacks us in isolation. We need to get out of the corner.”
LIFE Today TV

with Randy Robison

It was a joy to join Randy on LIFE Today to talk about Comparison. I especially appreciated the opportunity to talk about our current political and social climate, and how Christians are not to “compare down” in self-righteous disgust or condescension toward those who disagree OR those who sin differently than we do.

Redefining Balance Podcast

With Jenny Stemmerman

On this podcast for Christian working moms, Jenny and I talked about comparison and the impact it has on the way we see ourselves and others. We also talked about the “race to the bottom” and the difference it makes when – instead of trying to prove that we’re the “hottest mess”, we choose to be humbly vulnerable with each other.

Martha & Mary Show

Listen in to our conversation for both Martha-types and Mary-types as I talk about comparison with my dear friends, Katie Reid and Lee Nienhuis.

Art of Friendship

With Kim Wier

There is something in us that wants to prove that we have more or are more. We want to measure up. So what does this do to our relationships? Is there any way to stop being jealous of a friend? How should I respond to demands of this measure-up culture?

Here’s my conversation with Kim Wier, where we talk about these questions and more.

Your Spiritual Game Plan

with Cheri Fletcher

Cheri invites us as women, to live out our true callings—which stay consistent, throughout all the seasons of life. Comparison and the desire to measure up distracts us from God’s purpose for our lives. But what if we approached comparison with me-free humility? Rather than having our eyes on ourselves, what if we entered a room of people, saying, “I’m not here to prove that I have more or am more. I’m just here to share what’s in my measuring cup. What God has given me.” That’s when we are most fee to be ourselves.

 

The Notice

with Susan Hoekstra

It was a joy to get to know Susan on my launch team and talk with her about leaning in and say, “Yeah, me too…” and share our both our feelings of inadequacies and also the secret enjoyment we have in outdoing others. 

 

The Debbie Chavez Show

with Debbie Chavez

You can’t have a conversation with Debbie and not receive a little joy that spills over from her life. Listen in as Debbie and I talk about:

 how comparison is like a drug
• escaping comparison by listening to Jesus
• looking-down-your-nose comparison
• drowning-in-shame comparison
• comparing our physical appearances
• how serving changes the way we see others and ourselves

Christian Publishing Show

Overcoming Fear and Comparison 

If you’re a writer, speaker, or ministry leader, you’ve probably had to grapple with both fear and comparison as you’ve stepped out to use your gifts for God. 

Listen in as my co-author Kate Motaung and I have a conversation with Thomas Umstattd Jr. Brought to you by the Steve Laube Agency.

Comparison Girl Launch Party

Special thanks to these 5 Endorsers, who each made an appearance at my online launch party to chat about comparison and you can find them at these places in the video.

Erica Wiggenhorn: 34:12

Alicia Bruxvoort: 48:39

Barb Roose: 1:02:09

Katie Reid: 1:17:15

Lee Nienhuis: 1:30:23

Comparison Girl Chapters & Quotes:

Author and dear friend, Shannon Popkin, expertly and biblically walks us through several markers and mistakes of living according to comparison in this measure up world and gently points us to a better way. Written with humor and brutal honesty, Shannon sheds the pretense and fights for her readers’ hearts with biblical wisdom, humility and truth. Comparison Girl is a must-read for this generation of girls and the next.

Lee Nienhuis

Moms in Prayer Podcast host, Speaker, and Author of Countercultural Parenting

With a humble pen and a bold honesty, Shannon invites us to look closely at our subtle “comparison game” and recognize the truth behind it— Comparison is not just a harmless habit; it’s an all-out attack on the life we’ve been created to live. Using the very words of Jesus, Shannon shows us how to trade the exhaustion of measure-up comparison for the exhilaration of me-free living. Get ready to wage war and take back the abundant life you were created to enjoy!

Alicia Bruxvoort

Speaker and Writer with Proverbs 31 Ministries

Comparison is a sneaky issue that can work its way into almost any situation. But is all comparison bad? Through her in-depth study of the Scriptures, Shannon Popkin reveals two sides to this prevalent issue: negative, sinful comparison and positive, biblical comparison. This book both convicted me of the sinful tendencies hidden in my own heart and encouraged me to view myself and others through the eyes of Christ.
Kate Motaung

Author of A Place to Land: A Story of Longing and Belonging

In a sideways-glancing, elbow-jamming, status-grasping culture, Comparison Girl supplies an upside-down approach to an age-old problem. Shannon Popkin exposes the crippling effects that comparison has on our forward-motion in the Kingdom, yet also demonstrates how healthy comparison can inspire us to rise and walk free. Discover how to exchange feelings of superiority for a lifestyle of service and feelings of inferiority for a lifetime of belonging.
Katie M. Reid

Author of Made Like Martha, speaker, co-host of The Martha + Mary Show podcast

Comparison Girl is a needed resource for today’s women. I love how Shannon takes us through comparison in Scripture, acknowledging how normal it is for us to compare, but also providing biblical principles for how to manage it and take our eyes off of others and direct them to Jesus Christ.
Brenda Yoder

Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Author, Speaker

From My Shop: 

I’m on the air with Cru today! So thankful for the worldwide ministry of Cru (formerly Campus Crusade), and thankful for this opportunity to bring the reminder of the One who’s actually in control.

To hear this little clip, go to makingyourlifecount.com or use the link in my bio.

cru #OnTheAir #MakingYourLifeCount #WhoIsInControl #NotMe #NotYou #LookUp
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Check your inbox (or spam) for a message from me this morning!

Not signed up for my emails yet? There’s a link in my bio.

I send out my “Live like it’s true!” newsletters once a season, and occasional announcements (like today!).

#bignews #cantwait #checkyourinbox
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"[Jesus] did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant.. He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross." (Phil. 2:6-8)⁠

Today is the day we remember what Jesus, the prize of heaven, did in our place. The one whose cup was most supremely full of glory and power and righteousness, tipped his filled-to-the-brim cup and emptied himself on the cross and “poured out his life unto death" (Is. 53:12). ⁠

Jesus endured this shame, not because he had sinned, but because we have. He hung on a tree of shame and death that we might one day have the honor of eating from the tree of life.⁠

If Jesus HAD grasped or gripped or clung to his equal-to-God status (which he deserved), he couldn't have emptied himself in such abject humility on a cross. And if we grasp onto our pride and self-sufficiency, we can't receive the gift of eternal life, which he bought for us on that cross.

The Gospel is this: the one who had a cup brimming full of righteousness emptied himself for the ones who had not one drop.⁠

"And can it be that I should gain⁠
An int’rest in the Savior’s blood?⁠
Died He for me, who caused His pain—⁠
For me, who Him to death pursued?⁠
Amazing love! How can it be,⁠
That Thou, my God, shouldst die for me?" ⁠

-Charles Wesley⁠

#goodfriday #Jesusemptiedhimself #Philippians2 #gloryofthecross #andcanitbe⁠
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My friend, Erika VanHaitsma is sharing "The Love Story of the Passover" on @reviveourhearts podcast this week! (link in bio)⁠

If you've worked with me as a speaker, you've gotten to know Erika as my amazing assistant. 🥰 But she is also a speaker, teacher, and lover of God's Word! ⁠

Erika's passion is to make the Bible become alive with three dimensional color, and she does so powerfully in this five-part series re-airing during Passion Week on Revive Our Hearts. It's so good! I hope you'll take some time and listen. ⁠

Erika is also wife to Bryan and homeschooling mom of five kids. They make their home near Ludington, MI. ⁠

Connect with Erika at www.erikavanhaitsma.com.
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In the past 2 weeks, I’ve shared ten messages...

I’ve served six groups...

I’ve traveled to PA, SC, MI..

I’ve connected virtually with a group in Panama, and one virtual group from multiple states...

I’ve talked about control, comparison, surrender and humility...

I’ve shared from platforms with steps and platforms with links...

I’ve communicated using microphones and cameras, laptops and ring lights, a Spanish interpreter, and just some notes in my lap.

Each audience has been unique and special, yet each woman needs the same thing: Jesus, and the wisdom of His Word.

I’m so grateful for every opportunity I get to share truth from the Bible and invite women to live like it’s true.

But, I must say, I’m also grateful for rest stops in between—like my next two non-speaking weeks. It’s Friday y’all.

Is anybody else looking forward to a weekend home as much as I am?

#wepour #Hefills #thankyouJesus #sogratefultoserve #thankyouLord #Christianspeaker #readyforabreak
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#Repost @clcpty
・・・
The path of surrender ends in freedom! Jesus invites us to confess what he did: “Not my will but yours be done” (Luke 22:42).

I am looking forward to gathering with my sisters from panama tomorrow evening online! Join us! More information at @clcpty


¡El camino de la rendición termina en libertad!
Jesús nos invita a confesar lo mismo que Él: “No se haga mi voluntad, sino la tuya” (Lucas 22:42).
.
.
___
@editorialportavoz @shannonpopkin @CLCpty #mujeres #mujeresdefe #control #libertad #diosestuguia🙏 #dejateguiarpordios😉☝
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Some of the stories that @hollyhmyers shares on her #itisforfreedom podcast naturally cause jaw-dropping amazement. But my story isn't like that. I was an average kid with average bondage-to-sin issues and yet God picked me out and set me free. And that DOES cause me to react in jaw-dropping amazement. ⁠

I'd love to share my freedom story with you on the #itisforfreedom podcast! ⁠

PS. If you listen, you're gonna be able to tell that I totally did not prepare for my "Who would you have coffee with?" question. ☕️Afterward, I was thinking, "Why did I pick two men??! I don't ever go out for coffee with men!" #facepalm ⁠🤦‍♀️

But now that I've thought more than two seconds, I have my answer for the WOMAN I would choose to have coffee with. Can you guess who? ⁠

Link in my bio.⁠

Thanks, @hollyhmyers for inviting me to share!⁠

#Christianpodcast #freedominChrist #tellingmystory #HISstory #podcastguest #freetobe #freedom #freeindeed #womensministry #setfree #livingfree #grace #wearefree #womensbiblestudy
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#Repost @monica_malbouef (Thank you Monica!!!)
・・・
Whoop! I have a new favorite coloring book! Thank you @shannonpopkin for the extra surprise 😉 This is a coloring companion to go along with the #controlgirl study that every women needs to read! Beautiful illustrations by @janyretromp - Thanks ladies for sharing your gifts this way!

#reflectionsonsurrender #coloringbook #newcover
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Once when Jesus was teaching, a man called out from the crowd, "Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me" (Luke 12:13). It wasn't the time or place, and Jesus told him so. Then he turned to the crowd and said, "Watch out! Be on guard for all types of greed" (Luke 12:15). ⁠

Notice that the man brought Jesus a two-person problem. Two brothers who disagreed about an inheritance. But Jesus used this teachable moment to warn about a one-person problem: greed. ⁠

The problem with greed is that you don't know it's your problem. You see everyone else as your problem. Like the person who has a bigger house. The person who has a nicer car. Or the person who goes on vacation every two months. ⁠

Even if you could even things out so that you have just as much in your measuring cup as they do, have you rid yourself of the problem? No, because greed is insatiable. ⁠

Greed affects people who have surplus ad scarcity alike. It's is a poison that will seep into any available heart, regardless of how thick your wallet is. ⁠

So how can we get rid of greed? Many would say just stop comparing. But that's as easy as choosing not to notice that your friend is on vacation again, while you're stuck walking her dog in the snow. ⁠

Jesus didn't teach us not to compare. For more, go to my post titled, "How to stop Comparing Wealth."
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Leading a retreat or wrapping up a Bible study? Check out my surrender prayer stations. 6 interactive prayer stations to encourage your women to spend some intentional time in prayer before the Lord. ⁠

These work nicely with my Control Girl study. $5 in my shop at shannonpopkin.com. ⁠

Leaders sign up for my Leader List and get them for free. ⁠

#smallgroup #leadsmall #prayerstations #surrenderprayer #smallgroupleader #bowbeforehim #whenwomenpray #biblestudywrapup #womensretreat #controlgirl
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Are you exhausted by measure-up comparison?

 

Get the Comparison Girl Bonuses 

& Learn to Live Me-Free in this Measure-Up World  

Great! Check your email (or spam) for a message from shannon@shannonpopkin.com.

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