Do you compare yourself?


On social media, in the neighborhood, at church, or the school drop-off lane, do you push yourself to prove that you measure up, then feel ashamed when you don’t? Measuring yourself against others isn’t healthy. And it isn’t God’s plan. In fact, the way of Jesus is completely upside down from this measure-up world. He invites us to follow him and be restored to freedom, confidence, and joy.

Join me as—with humor and straightforward honesty—I share what I’ve discovered about my own measure-up fears and get-ahead pride in this six-week study. Together, we’ll explore the conversations Jesus had and stories he shared with people who—like us—were comparing themselves.

Let’s leave measure-up comparison behind and connect with those around us by choosing Jesus’s me-free way of living: lifting others up and pouring ourselves out!




Releasing May 19, 2020

Harvard University did a study, asking people which they would prefer: A salary of 50K when everyone else had 25K? Or a salary of 100K when everyone else had a salary of 200K.

What percentage of people chose option 1? You can add your guess in the comments.

There is something in us that wants to prove that we have more or are more. We want to measure up. So what does this do to our relationships? Is there any way to stop being jealous of a friend? How should I respond to demands of this measure-up culture?

Come listen in to my full conversation with Kim Wier on the "Art of Friendships" podcast, where we talk about these questions and more. Link in bio

#comparisongirl #spoutnotlines #pouringnotmeasuring #upsidedowncomparisons #lastshallbefirst #greatestistheservant #podcast #artoffriendship @kiminnac

20 2

That’s my guy, reading my book. So grateful for him.

#comparisongirl #myhusband #hesoneofthegoodguys

81 4

Are you driven to prove that you measure up? Jesus did exactly the opposite. He emptied himself, and invites you to do the same.

What is he inviting you to empty yourself of today?
The need to be right?
The need to be respected?
Fear of what people think?

When we tip our measuring cups to pour ourselves out, our great God fills those empty spaces with more joy, more freedom, and more peace. He fills us with Himself.

Jesus—whose measuring cup is bigger than the universe and brimming full—took all His fullness and emptied himself (Phil.2:7). How is He asking you to do the same?

#ComparisonGirl #LastWillBeFirst #GreatestIsTheServant #SpoutnotLines #StopMeasuring #StartPouring

30 0

Hey mamas, how you doing? Feeling boxed in? Worried about how this pandemic is affecting your kids? Frustrated with all the outcomes that are unraveling?

We get you. We have the same concerns. And like you, we want to know what Jesus would have us do in response.

Join my friend @leenienhuis (we took this selfie together a year or so ago) and I on the @momsinprayer podcast for a conversation on comparison, control, and surrendering the unknowns of COVID-19.

Link in bio.

#MomsInPrayer #WhatICanControl #WhatICan’tControl #PouringNotMeasuring #ComparisonGirl #ControlGirl

50 1

“Mothers everywhere are facing the same anxiety producing decisions about sending their kids to school this fall. While questions abound about our immediate futures, author and Bible teacher, Shannon Popkin, says maybe loss of control is just what our Heavenly Father will use to help us grow. Today, Lee sits down with Shannon to discuss the illusion of control, the destruction that comes with comparison, and walking in faith with our families during these uncertain times.”

I always love connecting with my friend @leenienhuis ! If you’re feeling weary, overwhelmed, frustrated… We are praying that this conversation will be an encouragement and support to you, friend! Link in my bio.

#ComparisonGirl #MomsInPrayer #PrayerChangesThings #PrayerChangesMe #StopMeasuring #StartPouring #Spoutnotlines

35 7

“I am a Comparison Girl. I never wanted to play into the enemy’s plan for dismantling my contentment and peace, and I suspect you don’t want to either. So it’s high time we cast aside our measuring mentality and adopt a new way. Shannon Popkin expertly walks us through the markers and mistakes of this measure-up world and gently points us to a better way. With humor and brutal honesty, Shannon fights for her readers’ hearts with biblical wisdom, humility, and truth.”
—Lee Nienhuis, author and host of the Moms in Prayer podcast

I'm so thankful for my friend, Lee, and the many ways she encourages me to press on in ministry. Lee is the real deal. I have watched her over the past couple of years faithfully choosing to serve the Lord, come what may. I love her heart for Jesus and am so grateful for her support on this new book (especially since she her own book #counterculturalparenting was launching at the same time!).

Find her at or @leenienhuis and tune in tomorrow (Monday) for my conversation with Lee on the Moms in Prayer podcast. Love you, Lee!

#sistersinministry #thankfulforyou #endorsement #biblestudy #comparisongirl

37 0

Have you been measuring yourself against somebody else? Your house? Your kids? Your marriage? Your carreer? Your waist size?

"When they measure themselves by themselves... they are not wise," wrote missionary Paul, to the church he had planted in Corinth.

He was responding to critical concerns raised by some people who were saying he didn't measure up, compared to other leaders. Paul rightly defended himself, saying that HE wasn't the problem; they were because they were foolishly measuring their leaders against each other.

Wise people don't measure themselves or others against each other. Wise people recognize that God fills some measuring cups with more, and others with less and that's up to Him.

A wise servant of the Lord simply takes what she has - her house, her kids, her marriage, her job, and even her body, and uses the one life she's been given to serve the Lord and others.

How can you wisely take this week, this day, this summer, or this life and start focusing on your measuring cup's spout, not the lines?


31 2

Is there someone who's making you feel small? Maybe she’s prettier than you. Or more productive with her time. Maybe she’s a better decorator. Maybe she serves her kids wild caught salmon and organic veggies and you serve yours fish sticks and fries...

Do you find yourself wanting to avoid her, because next to her you feel measure up SMALL?

That's obviously how the disciples felt, the day they were arguing about who's the greatest on the road to Capernaum. Why would they posture and puff up, if they weren't feeling small?

If you wonder how Jesus would respond to your frustrations over being made to feel small, look how he responded to the disciples. He called them in for an object lesson. Taking a baby into his arms, Jesus said, "Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."

You and I might have pointed at Peter, James, or John as an example of greatness, but Jesus turned their attention to the smallest person in the room. “Want to be great? Be a little person,” he said.

Kingdom greats are those who choose to see themselves as small. This involves a "littling of self" but not a belittling of self. That’s an important distinction.

Humility isn't denying that we have MORE in our measuring cups - whether more gifts or talents or resources. That's not what Jesus was asking these disciples to do. Instead Jesus was asking them to pour out that "extra" in their measuring cups, rather than using the extra to prop ourselves up.

Humility isn't denying that I have more, but it's also not shaming myself when I have LESS in my measuring cup. It's recognizing that if God wanted me to have more, he would have given it. So instead of shrinking back or sulking, I'm going to take what little I have and get busy with pouring.

Interested in more? Check out my new book at

#comparisongirl #greatestistheservant #firstwillbelast #lastwillbefirst #wordsofJesus #sheepknowhisvoice

28 5

As we inch toward the school year, there is much uncertainty, conflicting information, change, and stress. And here's what will compound it all: glancing sideways to measure what I'm pouring out (as a mom, in ministry, at work, etc.) with what she is.

Can I encourage you with some words from Jesus? Our Lord never told us that we were supposed to produce as much as or more than somebody else. (Look at the story of the vineyard workers in Matt. 20.) He never shamed anybody because they had less to give. (Look at the story of the widow who gave two copper coins in Luke 21.)

Jesus encouraged each of us to take whatever is in our measuring cup and use it - not to lift ourselves up, but to serve the world.

Friend, you and I might have different amounts in our measuring cups, and we might be called upon to pour out in different ways during these trying times. But regardless of our differences, we each have equal opportunity to tip our cups, pour out what we have, and serve. Which means we each have opportunity to pursue kingdom greatness!

"The greatest among you shall be your servant. Whoever exalts [herself] will be humbled, and whoever humbles [herself] will be exalted. (Matt. 23:11-12)

#comparisongirl #greatestistheservant #firstwillbelast #lastwillbefirst #wordsofJesus #sheepknowhisvoice

28 0

As one of Jesus's sheep, you must listen for his voice. You must listen long and listen carefully so that your ears are so tuned the voice of Jesus that you can reject messages that aren't from Him.

Messages like, "You're not enough." Or, "Nobody loves you." Or, "You're not worth it. You'll never measure up." Friend, these are things that Jesus would never say. He's never said anything that sounds remotely like this (check your Bible). If Jesus is your master, his words must matter most.

We need to be women who are ready to capture inferiority thoughts and hold them captive, rather than letting them run rampant through our minds to do their destructive damage. We need to be women who say, "I will reject thoughts of inferiority, which aren't from Jesus."

For a set of prayers like this, sign up for my free Comparison Girl bonuses - link in bio. Learn more at

#comparingup #comparingdown #measuringup #pouringout #livingmefree #comparisongirl

33 2

Here's the tip I got to share in the wrap up of our Speak Up panel on Platform-Building: As influencers, we must continue the ongoing work of sorting out our motives.

So often, we set out with a heart to selflessly share what God has first given us. But there's no denying social media's strong undertow of self-interest.

Instead of simply desiring to serve and give and share, my motives are muddied with a desire to receive praise, get applause, and gain recognition.

In our book Influence, I shared a Heart Sifter tool which helps weed out the impure motives, so we can see the ones which are pleasing to God, and make our next decisions. (Check out more on this book at )

But for the daily, little choices about what will I post, how will I steward my time, and how will I interact on social media, it's helpful to regularly return to these two questions:

Am I here to serve others, or myself?
Am I here to lift up Jesus or me?

#elevatingJesusnotme #shinebrightly #followmeasifollowhim #lifthimhigh #influencebook #christianwriters #christianspeakers #speakuprocks2020 #SpeakUpRocks @katemotaung @fiveminutefriday

36 0

TODAY: I'll be joining my friend, Michelle Nietert, on her facebook page LIVE today at 11:30 CST (12:30 EST)!

Michelle has been doing an amazing job of building enthusiasm and giving you a window into the Speak Up conference as she interviews various faculty members each week. But THIS week, we're teeing things up, because the conference begins tomorrow!!

So if you're attending Speak Up, or interested in someday attending, please join us as we talk about Speaking Up as Christians. #SpeakUpRocks #SpeakingUp #ChristianWriters #ChristianSpeakers #WritersConference #PlatformBuilding #StartsTomorrow #InsiderScoop

22 0

New trailer video!
Learn more at

42 7

In this podcast interview, you’ll hear my first impression of Jen, then her version of the story. Plus our difference in coffee mug collection. And some great truth on finding freedom from measure-up living. #linkinbio

Here’s Jen:
It is so easy to get in a comparison trap as we scroll social media or look at others lives .

I loved talking with my friend @shannonpopkin about how to pour instead of trying so hard to measure up .

Join us by searching Coming Alive Conversations on your favorite podcast app or by going to #comingaliveconversations

17 0

From the Blog

Moms in Prayer Podcast + MORE!

Moms in Prayer Podcast + MORE!

Hey, friends! I'm so excited to share some of the podcast interviews I've had recently. I'll highlight a few, but you can find links to many more at Moms In Prayer: Comparison, Control, and Surrendering the Uncertainties of Covid Are you feeling...

read more
Is Comparing Your Holiday Bringing You Down?

Is Comparing Your Holiday Bringing You Down?

As you scroll through the photos of everyone sharing their 4th of July highlights, do you need a reminder not to compare? I did. My husband and I had a rather quiet 4th. None of our kids were home. It had been a busy week so we just stayed home. No fireworks. No...

read more
It’s Launch Day!

It’s Launch Day!

Hi friends! What a joy to introduce you to my new book, Comparison Girl: Lessons from Jesus on Me-Free Living in a Measure-Up World. This book has weighed heavily on my heart over the past year and a half. I've thought of the woman who will open it's pages, looking...

read more

Are you driven to measure up?

Is comparison bringing you down?

 Get my heart-steadying Comparison Girl reminders,

including screen savers, prayer cards, story templates & more.  

Great! Check your email (or spam).

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This
jQuery(function ($) { //open toggle on button click $('').on('click', function(event){ $('#toggle3.et_pb_toggle_2 .et_pb_toggle_title').click(); }); });