I noticed something about the couple sitting down the row from us in church last week. He kept whispering little things in her ear and she kept smiling. Their interaction was subtle, not distracting, but very sweet. Though she didn’t laugh out loud, it was clear that she thought he was funny. And he was grinning from ear to ear. Wouldn’t any guy?

 At first I thought, “They must be newlyweds”, but then I saw their kids, who are just a bit younger than our kids. Hm.

When we were first dating, I laughed easily at Ken’s jokes. I was easily impressed or persuaded. Now, it takes a little more to charm me. Sometimes I’m moody. Other times, I’m distracted. Even though he truly is funny, I make him work harder to get a laugh out of me. 

When I watched that other wife, though, I want to go back to laughing more. I mean, is it so difficult to manage a wide smile and a deep laugh? And they add so much to a relationship. 

My response to Ken totally sets the tone for our marriage. I can make or break the next hour of married life, just based on how I respond to my husband. Do I look up when he walks into the room? Do I roll my eyes as he walks out? Do I smile when he makes a comment? Do I respond enthusiastically when he makes a suggestion? Yes, he’s the leader of our home, but I have a lot of influence over what happens next, based on how warm or cold my response to him is. And by far, my warmest responses are characterized by an easy laugh. (When laughter was the intended response, of course.)

(Now that last line—the one in the parenthesis—that was funny! It’s something Ken would say, if he were reading this. Did you laugh? You better have laughed. Otherwise, you’re probably getting a little too stoic, like yours truly.)