·         My daughter will be with the other side of the family. We’ll miss her, but she knows they are welcome if their plans change. (0 points)

·         My kids alternate holidays with the other side of the family, so we work really hard to find a time that works for everyone. They know it means a lot to me when everyone from ‘our side’ can be together. (2 points)
·         Well, of course I assumed you were driving in on Christmas Eve! If you don’t, you won’t be here for Christmas morning! And yes, I remember that you have a baby now. I’m her grandma, thank-you-very-much. Which is why I want you to be here on Christmas morning! (5 points)

2.       The time and place:

·         I’m willing to host for Christmas, but I still have to check with my brother and see what they want to do. (0 points)

·         If we moved our dinner to 7:00, do you think you could make the 4 hour trip and squeeze both in? (5 points)
·         I don’t understand why it’s so difficult. I give everyone 2 weeks notice! I’m trying to be gracious, but I’m privately annoyed that we’re moving dinner back because of the baby’s nap schedule. (5 points)

·         Hi Everybody. I know, Jessica, you offered to have Christmas at your house. But do you think we could have it here? I was kind of counting on it. Thanks for understanding! (10 points)

3.      The menu:

·         I’m completely open. What would you like to bring? (0 points)

·         I have a plan, but I’m flexible. Could you bring a salad or some mashed potatoes, please? I can give you the recipe, if you don’t have one. (2 points)

·         I’m hesitant to change the menu. It’s tradition! Could you save that new recipe for…uh… your church potluck? (5 points)

·         I will be making everything again this year. No, you can’t bring anything. (But you’d better appreciate all I do for you.) (10 points)

4.      The traditions:

·         We may try to do a few special things this year, but I refuse to stress out about it. (0 points)

·         We have several Christmas traditions. But to be honest, I usually get irritable and finish the gingerbread houses or the decorating myself because the kids start complaining that they’re bored, or start fighting with each other. (2 points)

·         I decorate the house exactly the same each year. We always go to the same farm to get our Christmas tree.  I have six kinds of cookies that I make. We have three movies we watch. We like to keep everything the same. (5 points)

·         We have a tradition for every night of the week leading up to Christmas. And it takes us all of Christmas day to get through everything. It’s tradition! (10 points)

5.       The Gifts:

·         I do what I can, but I don’t stress out about it. I try to emphasize the joy of being together more than the gifts. (0 points)

·         I work really hard to get unique, special gifts. I stay within my budget, but sometimes I get grumpy because of all the effort it takes. (2 points)

·         I refuse to buy gifts for anyone. I don’t like to shop, and I’m tired of buying things people don’t like or need. I’ve decided I’ll just write checks. (5 points)

·         I totally go overboard on gifts, but everyone knows I love to buy nice things. I usually stay up all night wrapping everything beautifully, too. I would be really disappointed if my family members didn’t appreciate all that I do. (Or if they didn’t reciprocate.) (5 points)