When Lindsay was about two, we stopped at Cracker Barrel for dinner. We had been driving quite a while, and both Ken and I were cranky. After we were seated, we began to argue with each other about who-knows-what. We were in the middle of a move to a new city, so it was probably over something silly like whether to drop our house’s asking price, or whether to place an offer on a house in the new location. (We had lots of arguments about these subjects.)

After we had exchanged several uncomplimentary zingers, I tired of the argument and stood up. I reached for Lindsay and said, “Want to go out with Mommy and look at some of the pretties in the store?”

But Lindsay shook her head, no, her curls bobbing. She pointed at my seat and said, “Sit down. Dwink-a-water and talk-a-Daddy.”

Even though she was too young to understand our argument, she obviously sensed that a resolution had not been reached. This was unsettling to her, and she craved it.

So, I did as she asked. I sat back down. I took a few sips of my water, and Ken and I worked on a resolution–which involved both of us apologizing and reconciling. Then, Lindsay said, “OK, Mommy. Now I go see da pretties.”

It’s so important to remember that the emotional climate of our family relationships have a profound impact on our children. Even when they’re too young to understand what the tension is about, they know it’s there.