Women don’t join a small group because they want to show off their new scarf or nail polish color. They get plenty of superficial interaction during the rest of the week!
Women come to small group because they want to be part of something. They want to pour the contents of their hearts into a circle of girl friends who will lean forward with interest, laugh at their funny stories, and cry over their heartaches. They want to know and be known. If they are Christians, they want to share the amazing things that God has done, and enlist the support of others as they bear up under the trials.
But as a leader (either officially or not) in your group, how do you help make this connecting happen?
Suppose you’re planning a time that your MOPS group or your Bible study group can connect over the summer. Or maybe you’re planning a reunion with your college friends or cousins. Or you’re planning an evening for your small group at your home. How do you keep from letting the evening or weekend get burned up in discussions about favorite TV shows or new workout routines? How do you make sure your group actually connects–at the heart level?
The answer: questions. Really, really good questions. The kind of questions that sift down to the heart level and give your friends the opportunity to share who they really are. I call them Circle Questions (available in my shop) because as you go around the circle answering questions, you’re pulling a tighter circle of support around each woman.
Over the past decade as I’ve experimented with lists of questions as I’ve led various small groups. And the results have been remarkable. Questions can absolutely change the chemistry of a group. I’ve seen it happen!
Because I love good questions and good groups so much, I’ve created a 100 card set of my favorites. I call them ‘Circle Questions’ because as you go around the circle answering questions, you’re cinching a tighter circle of support around each woman.
These questions are designed for small groups of (4-12) women, who are open to God’s involvement in their lives. The cards are color coded to represent the following categories:
- Families of Origin
- Spiritual Life
- Personal Growth/Career
Here are some examples:
- What do you see differently about your family of origin, now that you are an adult?
- What do you love most about your husband’s family?
- What was your biggest career mistake? How has this helped you grow?
- How do you best make up for any lack in your husband?
- Which of your kids is most like you? How does this affect your parenting?
- What major life event has taught you that God is trustworthy?
Are you ready to go? Check out my Circle Cards here:
If you’re worried about making mistakes, don’t be! But if you want to learn from my mistakes, go here.
If you’d like, swing back sometime and let me know how your group reponds. I’d love to hear from your story of how Circle Questions made a difference in your group.